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They will think life is relatively normal and then they discover lots of pornography on the computer, or that the person they are with has been meeting others for sex and it comes as such a shock.
“They usually have lots of questions that there aren’t clear answers to initially and they need to be careful of their own mental health because it can take a massive toll.” Here, two women who are married to sex addicts share their stories (their names have been changed).
Ava is in her 40s, has been married for 22 years and has four children My husband was and is my best friend.
We were married 20 years with four kids when I found out about his sex addiction.
But she says, “that changes very quickly when the devastation for the person and their partner comes to light”.
There were many times when the pain was so bad that I wanted to die.
I asked “why” over and over but have learnt that the why may never be known in sex addiction and accepting that was important.
The Rutland Centre has seen a rise in the numbers seeking help for sexual addiction.
In 2009, 1 per cent of its clients were treated for sex addiction and that figure has now risen to 5 per cent.He was out one evening in March 2011 and I picked up his laptop.He hadn’t closed down the webpage he had been on and it opened in an email account which he had been using to live a separate life for years.Did I stay during his treatment and see what would happen on the other side, or did I leave him? I put the man I know him to be on one side and the addiction and terrible choices on the other and it always shifted one way.